Thursday, December 12, 2013

blurbtinis minus the cake

The other day I was trying to find out if you can share Google Play Books with a Kindle.  I typed into my Google search bar "can you sh" and suggestions of what I might be searching for started popping up.  The first suggestion was "can you shoot up xanex", the second suggestion was "can you shoot a gun in space", and the third suggestion that popped up was "can you shoot molly".  I immediately stopped looking at the suggestions because A.) I didn't want to know the answer to suggestion three, and B.) I didn't want to know what else people were wondering if they could shoot.  I finally did get my answer, and no, you cannot share Google Play Books with a Kindle.  However, you can shoot up xanex if you're wondering.

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When I first met Tom he did not know how to tie a tie.  This is not a slight at Tom it is just a fact.  He didn't need to know how to tie one.  He hated dressing up and it took him about 15 minutes to get his dress shirt tucked into his dress pants.  I remember when he was getting ready for his White Coat Ceremony at the beginning of medical school he got all sweaty, angry and flustered because he hated getting dressed up so much.  He even faked a choking noise when I buttoned the top button on his shirt and put his tie on.
However now he can tie a tie in his sleep and can get completely ready and out the door in the time it used to take him to tuck in his shirt.  There are no longer choking noises when he puts his tie on, and his shirt is not pitted out before he gets somewhere.
Last weekend he had to travel to Oklahoma with the Women's Basketball team.  Usually on travel days he either wears a warm up suit like the team or a shirt and tie.  This weekend when he was getting packed up and ready to leave I asked him was he wearing his warm up suit or shirt and tie on the plane.  His answer literally made my jaw drop..."I'm more comfortable in the shirt and tie so I'll wear that."  Never in a million years did I ever think I would hear the words I'm more comfortable in a shirt and tie over sweat pants come out of my husbands mouth!

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The other night Tom and I were watching the show "Tanked" on Netflix.  It's super funny and I highly recommend it.  Anyway, someone on the show said, "Building that tank was no cakewalk" and it got me to thinking...
First of all I started thinking about how good some cake would be.
Secondly I started thinking about the saying, "easy as a cakewalk or that was no cakewalk".  The saying "cakewalk" is meant to mean a task that is suuper easy.  However, if you think back to your elementary school "Fun Night" days you might remember a game called The Cake Walk.  It was my favorite game because you needed absolutely no skill.  It was as easy as the game where you picked a lollipop out of the cardboard cut-out tree.  For the cake walk all you did was walk around in a circle to music.  When the music stopped you looked down to see what number you were standing on.  Then the mom or dad running the game picked a number out of a hat and if you were standing on that number you won a cake!  Suuper easy right?  Except the problem I have is, I never won a damn cake.  No matter how many times I walked around the stupid circle I never won.  So really cakewalk is not easy unless you win the cake.  Then I guess it's ok if you use the saying, but only if you really won a cake.

XO XO,
Cakeless Molly

Monday, December 9, 2013

Presents are fun to get but more fun to give!

This is my present to you...a gift guide!  Now you can pick something below to give to me because really it's much more fun to give than to receive.  And I had a lot of fun putting this list together...I promise.

For the Woman in Your Life Who Prefers One of Her Boobs Over the Other
(hopefully it's her left one)
 
This shirt from J.Crew is perfect to show off your favorite boob as long as your favorite is your left boob.  The "broach" sits perfectly at nipple height and acts almost like pasties that Playboy models wear to parties, except this is for the Amish Playboy model.  J.Crew really went out of there way to help bedazzle an area that otherwise never gets any notice and I think we should all applaud them for this.

For the Bruce Jenner Wannabe or Just the Regular RC Nerd in Your Life
About 5 years ago I made Tom watch a "Keeping Up with the Kardashians" episode with me.  BIG Mistake.  Bruce Jenner (the Dad for those of you who don't keep up with the Kardashians) is big into RC Helicopters.  Tom decided they looked awesome.  Jokingly for Christmas that year I bought him a cheap RC Helicopter.  BIGGER Mistake.  He now has an entire fleet and is looking into renting space at a private hanger.  His brothers also are / have gotten into RC crap as have his friends.  The wives are all really happy with Tom and glad their husbands are his friend.  Anyway, if you want to get your husband / boyfriend / brother something they will love get them some sort of RC Helicopter, Plane, Car, or Boat.  Here is a website that sells a lot of it: http://www.hobbyzone.com/

For Anyone In Your Life Except a Baby...I Don't Think Babies Should Get This Gift
A massage.  And no I do not mean a crappy coupon that you make that says, "I will give you a massage".  I mean get them a massage from a professional.  Pretty much any spa or massage place will do gift cards.  Trust me, people like massages.

For A New Mom or Anyone Who Looks Tired

Marc Jacobs Remedy Concealer Pen is amazeballs.  Dark Puffy Circles will disappear with this miracle pen.  You will never know someone has been up all night with a screaming baby or a snoring husband if they use this.

For the Cat Lady or Just Anyone Really Who Likes To Be Warm and Cozy
Whenever TV shows depict cat ladies I feel like they are always dressed in robes covered in cat hair.  Well, I've found the perfect robe to get covered in cat hair for your Cat Lady friend.  OR I've found the perfect warm and cozy robe for anyone.  Whatever your gift giving need might be...I'm here to help :)  Seriously though, I got a Target gift card for my birthday and spent it on this robe.  It's the perfect length, has pockets, and is warm and fuzzy.  It's perfect to throw over my pj's to let the dogs out or just put on over my clothes when I'm cold.  It's like a Snuggie that opens in front rather than in back.  But better cuz it's not stupid.

For Your Favorite Blogger (HINT HINT) or Techy
The new Kindle Fire HDX.  This tablet is pretty awesome and definitely topping my list of stuff I want but won't get.  Yes it's an e-reader, but it's so much more too.  Check it out if you're in the market for a tablet.  I've only played around with it at Best Buy, but it seems pretty sweet.

For Your Favorite Yogi (person who does yoga not the bear) Or Gym Rat
Tom is the hardest person ever to buy shoes for.  He wears size 14 and his feet are pretty flat and wide.  So when he finds a pair of shoes that work and are comfortable we buy multiple pairs in multiple colors.  Most recently he was in the market for a new pair of tennis shoes.  We did a bunch of online research and decided on these.  When they arrived he put them on and was amazed at how comfortable they were.  They did not need to be broken in, and fit great.  He got the grey / blue ones and they look really nice in person.  He keeps talking about how comfortable they are, so you should probably get them for someone.
Emily, my brother's girlfriend, is a Sales Manager / Rep. for Phat Buddha.  It's a yoga clothing company based out of New York City.  The clothing is awesome and I highly recommend it.  She gave me a few samples to try and I have been living in the leggings.  The ones pictured above are my favorite.  Check out their website https://phatbuddhawear.com/ or email Emily directly at Emily@phatbuddhawear.com and she will help you get the right product.  Seriously YOU NEED THESE LEGGINGS!

For the Caffiene Addict Sweet Tooth Alcoholic
Rum Chata found at your local liquor store is the best thing since Lucky Charms started selling the marshmallows separately.  It's like Bailey's but 100 times better.  You can drink it on ice, add it to a milk shake, or put it in a hot cup of cocoa or coffee.  The cocoa pictured above was given to me for my birthday last year and is far and away the best hot cocoa I've ever had.  The coffee pictured is also some of the best home brewed coffee I've ever had.  Even my parents thought the coffee was amazing when they visited and they are coffee snobs so you know it's good.

For the Person Who Has 1 Million TV Channels and Still Thinks There is Nothing on TV
Get them a Netflix Subscription and an Internet TV box.  If they can't find something on one of their million channels or on Netflix they are annoying.  This should solve all their problems.  I don't know much about the Internet TV boxes other than they exist.  I know a lot about Netflix...probably too much if we're being honest.

For the Rich Gamer
The Xbox One is the item topping Tom's list of wants that he won't get.  A.) because it's impossible to get your hands on, and B.) because we're not rich.  This video game console it like $500!  But if you're rich and have sneaky ways of getting your hands on things that are impossible to find this is the gift for you to give.  Whoever you give it to will love it, I promise.

For the Poor Gamer
Battlefield 4 is apparently supposed to be an awesome game.  I obviously don't know anything about it, but I've heard from a trustworthy source.  It looks like you can get it for any of the video game consoles too.  Don't get it for your children though.  Just to download this picture I had to enter my birthday.  I was a little concerned as to what I might find after I clicked enter.

So that's it!  My 2013 gift guide.  Now go spend money $$$$$$$  You're welcome :)

XO XO,
Molly

P.S. I am not working for or gaining anything by telling you to buy these products.  However, if you work for any of these companies and want to pay me for promoting your products I am happy to oblige.