CRRRRAAAAAZZZZZYYYYYY

I apologize for my absence lately, but HOLY HELL LIFE IS CRAZY RIGHT NOW!!!!!
Tom is in his final month of residency, he actually has a "graduation" tonight.  My mom is coming into town for it.  I was out of town for a funeral.  God sent us a lightening bolt of reality telling us our "plan" for next year sucked and we have been scrambling to make a new "plan" ever since.  We are putting our house up for sale tomorrow.  We have been painting trim, taking loads to Goodwill, cleaning, organizing, mulching, planting, patching woodpecker holes, etc. etc.  We still have so much to do before tomorrow.  I'm pretty sure we haven't slept more than 6 hrs. any night for the last  3/4 weeks.  Addie decided she doesn't like grass and it takes a lot of coaxing to get her to go potty outside.  So anytime that used to be spent washing dishes while the dogs were outside is gone.  Oh we also went to a wedding out of town.  This jumbled mess of a post is how life has been lately, so again my apologies.  Tom assures me things are going to get better.  I believe him because its my only hope.
Stick with me, and I promise I will be back to blogging like normal soon (hopefully)!


XO XO

You'll thank me for sharing all of this in one post

Recent happenings that I have chosen not to write entire blog posts about.  You will understand quickly why.

• I sat on the couch and smelled a smell.  I thought Tom was making a hot dog.  I then looked to my left and saw a pile of dog poop on the floor.  Not good for hot dogs.

Yes the poop is steaming

• I have a new appreciation for a friend.  We absolutely can't stand the same person.  Have you ever noticed how if you don't like someone or something and another person feels the same way you instantly become friends?  Love it!
•  Tom and I hopped on the green smoothie bandwagon.  We are both really loving it as are our intestines.  Although the budget for Febreeze air freshener has gone up considerably.

Tom happy with his smoothie.  Check out those guns!

 My favorite green smoothie concoction so far is: 1cup spinach leaves, small handful of cucumber, small handful of celery, big handful of broccoli, half an avocado, banana, honey, water, ice.  Blend it up and drink.  I use this one for breakfast since its a bit higher in the calorie department.

• Do you ever have those mornings where the outfit you imagine in your head doesn't turn out and you don't have time to change so you just have to go to work looking like a fool in an outfit that looks terrible?  That happened to me this week.  I imagined my skirt a different color and my top a cardigan instead of a flowing top and my shoes not black.  It was bad friends.  So bad in fact I went home and changed on my lunch break.  The weirdest part of the whole thing?  No one at work even noticed I changed my clothes.  And it wasn't a subtle change.
• My work is trying to get away from the IT company they currently use.  They have asked me and two other people to be our new IT department.  I had to look up what IT stood for.  I really hope they aren't expecting much :)  I mean I was pretty sure it stood for Information Technology, but not 100%.

Thank you all for your kindness after the last post and for your patience.  I feel like real life is just boring lately.  Except I did go to a bridal shower this past weekend (for a co-worker) and all there was was wine and fruit salad.  All the church people got drunk.  It was awesome.


 XO XO,
Going to buy more Kale and Febreeze now :)

Grumble, Grumble, Grumble

My sister-in-law called me out today...
"Dude, what's up with your lack of blogging?"

Writers block, that's what's up.

I am not feeling creative or funny.  I'm tired.  I thought the sunshine would help.  Nope.

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Also I weighed myself this morning and seriously I think my body is on strike.  I am working out no less than 4 days a week (usually 5) and tracking every GD thing I eat.  My clothes are loose, I packed away my winter clothes and brought out the Spring/Summer clothes and a bunch of stuff that didn't fit last year fits now, but the scale is not going down.

It probably didn't help that I ate out Thursday night, Saturday night, and Sunday twice.  It was for a good cause however, Kim's Birthday!  The Tums and I have become quite close in the last few days.

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I've also decided I am officially old.  If Tums are now a staple in my weekly grocery shopping and Tom keeps some on his night stand, we are officially old.  We have successfully skipped parenthood and gone straight to old people.  We also may or may not have prune juice, a blood pressure monitor, and wear slippers inside.  Help.

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My work got me an Administrative Professionals day card with a gift card.  It was a day late.  They said it was because I didn't remind them.  REALLY?!?!?

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Well my friends, stick with me.  Hopefully I'll get out of this slump soon and my usual charm and wit will be back.  Until then grumble on.

XO XO

Let it Snow...Let it Snow...STOP (expletive word) SNOWING ALREADY!!!!

Oh hello...did you know it's April 19?  Yeah me either...nothing about today or this last week has reminded me that it's April 19.  I keep waiting for Easter, then realize that was like a month ago.  There is no grass, no flowers, no sun, no sandals, no nothin'.  Can you tell I'm grumpy?  I'm seriously reconsidering my decision to stay in Minnesota next year.  I think Lucy states it best...

Tru dat Lucy...True dat

Last night I yelled and snapped at Tom for no reason other than the fact that it was snowing.  He thought I was having a absence seizure, whatever the hell that is, because I was literally staring outside not moving not saying anything just fuming.  This morning I might have cried a little in my garage while holding the shovel (which I now have a very close relationship with).  There is no end in sight to this weather either.  I think it's the end of the world.  For real.  

Last night when the tornado sirens went off I literally ran around our house like a crazy person yelling, "Tornado Blizzard, Tornado Blizzard" or "Addie stop licking and get downstairs so you don't blow away in the tornado blizzard you're white and no one will find you!".  No one bothered to tell me it was the nationwide test for the sirens.  Seems to me they should test when it is actually Spring not the middle of winter.

Here are some pictures from yesterday.  I took all except the one of Twins stadium which I found online.

Isn't it just the loveliest winter we're having this Spring?  I told my work I was going to work from Jamaica next week...I don't think they realize I'm serious.  The only type of blizzard I want to see for the next 5 years is this:

I've had enough.

XO XO,

Grumpy Molly

Barre. Not Bar. Although I would probably be a lot better at Bar.

Have you heard about the new (maybe it's not new I might be behind the fad) fitness trend that incorporates Ballet???  It's called Barre or Ballet Fusion or something along those lines.  It's crazy intense, at least the ones I've gone to, and is nothing like the ballet I experienced in Ballet 101 at the University of Iowa (I may have taken that class 3 times).

The class is an hour long.  The first time I went I started out strong.  I thought, "I can totally do this!  I took Ballet 101 three times I'm totally advanced!" then we got done with the warm up.  *$&@&  THAT WAS JUST THE WARM UP?!?!?!  At one point I looked down at my watch thinking surely the class had to be almost over (it started at 5pm)...it was 5:08pm.  *#@*&^$  I'm gonna die.

The class description is something along the lines of, "This class utilizes the classical ballet style to strengthen and tone your whole body.  No dance experience necessary."  I imagined a grand piano with a live pianist playing classical music and doing some plies.  That seems realistic right?!?

The class description should be, "This class requires you to be very coordinated and have at least 5 years experience doing fitness on your tipy-toes.  You must be able to do 10 different fitness moves on your tipy-toes with your knees bent all at the same time.  You must enjoy loud dance club music with a fast beat and have quadriceps of steal."

One of the moves we recently did required us to be standing at the bar with one hand holding on for dear life the other hand holding a free weight, while we held a ball between our knees and had a resistance band around our ankles.  We were then to move our hand holding the free weight up and down and our ankles in and out while not allowing the ball to fall.  Confused???  Maybe this diagram will help...

Please take note of how awesome my bangs look in the diagram.

Needless to say I spent more time chasing my damn ball around than I did doing the move (which really wasn't so bad considering I got to take a break).  Towards the end of the class the instructor had us doing 1 minute planks followed by running man things and I literally looked at her like she was crazy and laid there in child's pose.  Just when I thought we were done she yelled "8 MORE!" and I started packing up my things.  By the end of the class my legs were spaghetti.

My bangs keep getting awesomer and awesomer.

But I didn't feel too bad because the instructors legs were shaking too.  Now the real kick in the balls???  The locker room is downstairs so after this rip roarin' fun you get to walk down the stairs and back up just to leave.  I may or may not have gone and sat in the bathroom stall and cried a little.

The good news???  After two weeks of taking this class my pants are falling off me and I'm down an additional 6 pounds.  I guess I'll keep going.

XO XO,

This weekend I'm taking the BAR class

How Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, Smells, and Exclamation Perfume all go together. Also another Donkey Picture.

The sense of smell really is quite extraordinary.  Although I would much rather lose my sense of smell before losing my sight or hearing, to be able to smell is much more than actually smelling things.  Did you know you only really taste salt and the other tastes you think you are tasting are actually the smells?  (I'm pretty sure this is accurate but don't quote me.)  Smells can also transform a simple task into a long lost memory.  For example, maybe every time you bake chocolate chip cookies and smell them in the oven you are transported back in time to your grandmother's kitchen.  Or maybe every time you smell coconut your transported back to a beach with tanning oil.  Who knows?!?  Often these types of memories sneak up on us.

Well yesterday as I was busily working checking facebook for the 77th time a smell snuck into my office that transported me back to my elementary school days.  The maintenance guy was using Goo-Gone to get some sticky stuff off a cabinet.  Now you may be wondering what Goo-Gone could possibly remind me of from elementary school, but alas that is the craziness of how our sense of smell triggers these memories.

When I was little I was in love with the book / movie "Charlie and the Chocolate Factory" (the original not the creepy one with Johnny Depp).  I pretty much wanted to be Violet (the girl who turns into the blueberry) just so I could go to a place where I could lick the wallpaper and eat the marshmallow flowers.  As you'll remember she always was chewing gum...

So to really follow in Violet's footsteps I decided I would chew gum and often thought it would be cool to stick it behind my ear.  Then of course I would forget about it and shower with it back there and sleep with it back there and wake up and guess what?!?  It would be stuck all over my hair.  The first few times this happened my mom got out the Goo-Gone and was gentle and almost felt bad for me.  After it continued to happen my Dad just cut the gum out of my hair and my Mom would yell, "GET THE GOO-GONE!"  and would more or less rip the gum out of my hair.  Then to punish me she would make me go to school smelling like Goo-Gone because of course I still had to make it to the bus stop and there was no time to take a shower.  I would usually try and mask the smell with some perfume like "Exclamation" which I'm pretty sure you can still buy at Wal-Greens.  Let's just say the two smells together did nothing for my popularity at school which was pretty much already nonexistent.

Now I do take some responsibility for this, but seriously why did they keep giving me gum?  I literally got gum stuck in my hair at least once a month for years (this may be a slight exaggeration but not by much).

So yesterday, when the awful Goo-Gone smell crept its way into my office I was transported back to those hectic mornings getting gum ripped from my hair trying to make it to the bus without anyone noticing that it was me that smelled.


XO XO,
Smelly Molly

Happy St. Pat... Spring Cleaning Day!

Do you ever have those projects that aren't planned but stem from one tiny little mishap and change the direction of your entire weekend?  Since we moved into our home (in January 2011) the drawer under the stove has been slightly off the tracks.  Every time it is opened it falls crooked when it's closed again.  It's one of those things that drives you crazy at the time, but you quickly push it out of your mind because the stove is usually already turned on and hot and you need to get the skillet on it before your face burns off.

This weekend, after a full day of work, Tom had had enough of the drawer and pulled the entire thing out.  Unscrewed the hinges banged on a few sides and fixed it.  While the drawer was out we found the remaining macaroni noodles that had spilled a few months back after a late night of "spirits" and vacuumed them up, along with a disgusting amount of dog hair, a random cheese doodle, and some other questionably disgusting items found only under your stove/oven.  I then grabbed a bucket and sponge and washed the floor under the oven and around it's base.  What a nice feeling to know the underneath of your oven is nice and clean.  It will really make me sleep better at night...NOT!

 That same evening I needed to go to the store for eggs and ice.  Two items.  I ended up coming home with 3 bags of groceries and no ice.  Tom was annoyed to say the least as he had been waiting for the ice since I left and stormed out to go buy ice saying, "Tomorrow we are fixing the ice machine!"  Another little thing in our home that has never worked since we moved in.

So the next morning I woke up to the refrigerator pulled out to the middle of the kitchen and Tom telling me to see if water shoots out a tiny pipe.  This fix started the next round of macaroni noodle clean up, dog hair sweeping, and another round of sponge and bucket cleaning behind the refrigerator.  Then just as I thought everything was complete the water from the tiny pipe starting shooting water all over the freezer not just into the ice area.  We proceeded to pull everything out of the freezer give it a good rinsing off, clean the drawer bucket in the bathtub and organize the entire freezer.  By the time this ice machine project was complete we had a perfectly clean freezer, a bucket of ice, and a spotless area under and behind the refrigerator.

No dust bunnies here!

All the food from the freezer in the sink, and the freezer bucket clean!

With all the cleaning happening I'd forgotten to eat any breakfast and around 3pm was quite hungry.  With the kitchen torn apart I couldn't very well make anything to eat so I pulled a muscle milk out of the fridge and decided that would be good enough.  As I was drinking it I noticed this on the back of the bottle...

Although a donut sounded delicious the thought of crying myself to sleep sounded too depressing.

Lastly, remember this guy from the holidays???

He now has a forever home hanging on the wall of our garage.  He protects my car at night and watches over Tom while he tinkers on things (yes things because I'm never really quite sure what he is tinkering on).

Well I hope you all enjoyed your St. Patricks day more than the Spring Cleaning Day we had.

XO XO,

My Kitchen Is Cleaner Than Yours Is (for today at least) Molly

Tiny Morsels

I overslept today.  A simple sentence with many ramifications.  Oversleeping in my life equals waking up in a burst, running around with dogs chasing you because they think you are playing a game, sweating, 15 minutes of vigorous activity logged on Bodymedia, looking like crap for the entire day and a headache that can't be minimized by massive amounts of coffee.  Oversleeping basically ruins my entire day.  I called my mom on my way to work and told her I was pretty sure my outfit was illegal for church work.  Leggings with a shirt that I anticipated to be longer but really doesn't even cover my butt and boots.  It's like Julia Roberts in Pretty Women except I'm  not a prostitute or on Rodeo Drive.  Oh man, how I would love to be on Rodeo Drive right now rather than looking at more snow falling.

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Kim told me I was having a good bang day Sunday so I took a picture for all of you.  If this is what good looks like I don't want to see a picture of me on a regular or even a bad day!  YIKES!

I'm so serious about my bangs.

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Easter is coming and I couldn't be more excited.  We (Tom, Eric, Kim and myself) will be heading to good ole' Des Moines for some rootin' tootin' fun.  Yes tootin' will probably be a major source of the fun :)  My parents are very excited to have us and I am even more excited since I haven't seen them since Mexico.  Although my Mom would beg to differ and say she is MORE excited but really it's not a competition.  I'm also excited to see Ann who will be home for Easter.  But to be honest I'm a little worried that Ann and Kim are going to become besties and squeeze me out.  They have A LOT in common.

 

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I worked out everyday last week.  EVERY.SINGLE.DAY.  I logged my meals.  EVERY.STUPID.THING.I.ATE.  I gained a pound.  *#&^!&*#*  I think my body is in shock.  It's like where are all the jellybeans???  Dried coconut and peaches are not the same dammit!

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Last night I had a run in with a jalapeno.  I made Jalapeno Popper Chicken.  Everything was fine until I cleaned up.  Somehow I got it all over my left hand and it burned until I woke up this morning.  It was like the Alicia Keys Song "this girl is on fire" except it was "this hand is on fire!"  I once heard that milk helps if you eat something spicy so I poured the rest of our slightly expired milk on it and that helped for a bit.  I think Addie also accidentally ate a small piece that had fallen on the floor because she proceeded to drink 2 bowls of water and was still panting all night (this is my guess as to why she drank so much and was panting but it is not confirmed nor will it be).

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The title of this post is making me crave chocolate.  Doesn't the word morsel remind you of chocolate???  Or is this just my in-shock body talking again???  It also wants me to tell you about how we saw dark chocolate covered peeps at Wal-Greens and how I didn't buy them so to retaliate my body made me trip and fall outside.  Stupid chocolate peeps.

 

XO XO,

Setting my alarm tomorrow Molly

Trouble in the Bubble

You know those nights when you have something specific to do, but it's not until later and there is nothing to do before hand so you play a game?  Yeah we didn't either until a few nights ago.  We had plans but not until later and both of us were just sitting around so we decided to play a game.  We pulled out "Trouble" which Tom apparently used to dominate with his brothers, based upon his "special" whacking skills and continuous winning.  I could have cared less if I won.  I was more concerned as to why the weird guy from "The Big Bang Theory" was stuck inside a bubble on the cover of the box with a dog.

 

I feel like there's more than trouble in the bubble.  The dog looks like its thinking about attacking or just went to the bathroom and "Big Bang" guy looks like he just spit out the dice, which could be a serious chocking hazard.  Good thing there is a choking hazard warning.  Also this picture seems like false advertising.  I mean when I opened up my box and there was no guy or dog stuck in the pop-o-matic bubble most of my excitement flew out the window.  Don't get me wrong I played anyway, just not with quite as much enthusiasm.

XO XO,

Trouble in My Bubble

Where's Molly????

My mom sent me this picture recently.  Can you find me???

 Nope not the one that looks confused or the one with the creepy eyes.

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There I am!

Things that may or may not (but definitely did) recently happen.

1. I ate a tomato when everyone else ate CHOCOLATE birthday cake at work.  At the time this was a very hard thing to do.  I literally thought I was going to die.  But after much reflection I realized I didn't die from not having the cake, and actually felt pretty good about myself.  We won't go into the details on how I proceeded to eat a bag of jelly beans the next week.  I consider this a success!

2. I got a car wash over my lunch break earlier in the week.  I went to one of those "fancy" car washes where you get out of the car and they clean the inside while the car goes through the wash.  As I was waiting for my car to get cleaned (which technically I am still waiting because they did a terrible job) the shopaholic in me starting browsing in the car wash shop.  I looked at windshield wipers, floor mats, window cleaner, etc. etc.  I then noticed a wall of greeting cards.  I started reading through them and read one that I thought was sweet and I could send to a friend.  I also thought it would be funny to send her an air freshener.  Today as I was re-reading the card and getting ready to put it in the mail I realized the card was for a girlfriend.  As in a lesbian relationship you are my girlfriend kind of thing!  I sent the card anyway explaining that I loved her but not in a lesbian sort of way.  To the lucky recipient...it went in the mail today :) 

3. I cut myself bangs.  Tom was working one night and I decided at 11:00pm that I wanted a new look.  I felt that I had paid attention enough at the hair salon to achieve this look successfully.  I took my time (2hrs.) and succeeded in cutting bangs.  The next morning when Tom saw me his reaction was, "why the hell would you ever cut your hair like that?  Are you trying to be Michelle Obama?"  Let's just say I have been wearing them swept to the side.  No I'm not showing pictures.  I like them and so do other people, but I'm having a bad hair day today and they look exceptionally bad.  I'm sure it doesn't have anything to do with the fact that I woke up at 8:40am and had to chase Rocky and Addie around the yard when I let them out because they wouldn't listen.

4. Tom decided it was time to start wearing in his "Mexican boots".  He tried showing the dogs the importance of wearing them in.  Addie was not impressed.  I had to deal with him thinking he looked amazing in them.  I may or may not have had some seriously strong drinks to help get me through the night of organizing his closet and ties while he wore the boots.

5. I had my first experience with an amaretto sour and a VFW at the same time!  I learned I love both.  Kim wanted me to try an amaretto sour and since we were right next to a VFW she decided that's where I was going to try one.  We walked in in the middle of Bingo which people take very seriously around those parts.  Bunny got pissed when Betty Black won (those are our friends) and Stefano decided to be classy and drink a martini out of the only martini glass the bar had.  We didn't tell him it wasn't supposed to be yellow.  Everyone was very nice and welcoming but they did make us sign in.  It was an experience to say the least, and actually Kim and I can't wait to take Eric & Tom there!

Kim made me do this.  If you look closely you can kind of see the bangs swept to the side :)

Stefano being classy

6. I walked around with a fractured wrist for 3.5 days all the while Tom telling me I was fine.  I ended up at Tria acute injury clinic and walked out with this.

I'm sure Tom would want me to add that he did look at it and thought it was just a cyst (which was partially correct) and to tell you all how he is such an amazing doctor and all that crap truth.  I love him, but as my doctor???  Well it's hard to treat your wife I'm sure :)

XO XO,

I Want Chocolate Cake!!!!

7 Dreaded Words (this is your warning that things are getting gross today do not eat while reading this post)

Last Friday I had to bring the dogs in to see Uncle Josh (Tom's good friend and our vet).  It was just their annual exam and both dogs needed to get a few shots.  No big deal right???

WRONG.

As I was hanging up the phone with the office after scheduling the appointment I heard those dreaded words.  Seven little words that you just know are going to change the rest of your week until the appointment.  Seven words that mean you can't just let the dogs be dogs.  Seven words that are the most dreaded words to a pet owner.  Seven words...that's all.
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We're going to need a stool sample.

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*$?@! *$&@#*!&@# =  my reaction.  Wednesday (3 days before the appointment) I pull out two plastic sandwich baggies and write in permanent marker "Rocky" on one and "Addie" on another.  I then turn the baggies inside out so when you grab the "thimble size amount of stool sample" it is in the inside of the baggie and you can zip it up with their name on the outside.  (This isn't my first rodeo.)  Finally I put the baggies in the mudroom on the door handle of the door we let the dogs out of so they are RIGHT THERE when the time comes.  I tell Tom I've done all of this and that we really need to pay attention when we let them out because we need this by Friday afternoon.  Tom's response?  "They never poop when I let them out."  Really Tom??? Really?????  That's how your going to play this game???  @^!&^@*&$

I swear once the dogs see the plastic baggies they know and get shy.  Rocky is always a private pooper, going behind the shed to do his biznezz, but Addie will normally take a shit anywhere (she's very liberal).  But once they see those baggies they're like, "Nope not pooping in the flat grassy area now, gonna go down the hill in the farthest back tree line corner.  HAHA come and find me now!"

So Wednesday was unsuccessful.  Thursday I tried hiding the baggies, but that didn't help either.  By Thursday night I was desperate.  It was late.  I was ready for bed.  It was cold and dark.  I had to let them out one more time.  So I threw on my big honking snow boots, Tom's big coat grabbed the baggies and headed out with them to try and follow them around the back yard.  Of course they go in two completely opposite directions, so I try and stand in the middle of both of them flipping my head back and forth like I'm at a tennis match.

Then it happens...Rocky starts turning circles and sniffing.  I don't want to scare him off so I stand super still and wait.  He finishes and I start to walk into the line of trees to get it and POOF! the motion sensor light turns off.  I jump and wave my hands and it doesn't turn back on.  I try and memorize exactly where I am and start walking back up the hill towards the light to get it to turn on.  Finally it turns back on.  I walk back to the place I so carefully memorized only to find no poop.  Now here is where I should have thought, "go get a flashlight" but I was tired and my brain wasn't thinking and also it was really cold.  So instead of going inside to get a flashlight I start sniffing.  Yep here I am in the middle of the night in my pj's, snow boots, and Tom's coat sniffing around the back yard for dog shit.  What has my life come to?!?

I quickly realize this is ridiculous after touching (through the baggie) the same pile of poop three times to see if its warm and go back inside defeated once again.

I had one more opportunity and I had to get both dogs to poop at the same time and be able to find it and it will be in the morning which means I have to get my lazy ass out of bed with enough time to spare for all this rigamaroll.  You can imagine how happy I was about this.  Especially when I pulled myself out of bed and Tom continued to snore away.

I sleepily climbed into my poop scooping uniform from the night before and had a come to Jesus meeting with the dogs before letting them out.  Luckily both dogs listened (there may have been some divine intervention happening too) and I was able to collect both samples for the upcoming appointment with no further problems (except getting a twig stuck in my hair).

Those of you who say dogs don't prepare you in anyway for having kids must be kidding right?!?!?  I better not ever have to chase my kid around looking for their poop in the middle of the freezing cold night in the backyard (but I guess I will if I have to).

XO XO,

I've dealt with enough dog poop for my life Molly

Starting a New Relationship (no it's not sister wives stuff)

I was quite inspired by the Ash Wednesday service I attended this week.  The sermon was about love.  How you should tell the people you love that you love them, how to love all people, how Jesus loves you no matter what, and so on.  Secretly I think it was more about Valentines Day, but whateves.

As I was sitting there I started thinking about who I love.  Tom, Tyler & Matty, My Mom & Dad, Tom's Mom & Dad, My Brother & Emily, Jeff, Ryan & Cristy, Ann and her family, Eric & Kim, My Grandma, Grandma Donna, Rocky & Addie, Aunt Carole & Uncle Larry and their whole clan, and the list went on and on and on.  (Please don't be offended if I didn't list you out specifically.  My list really went on and on and I could fill this entire blog post with the names of people I love.)  As all these names ran through my brain I realized I really am one lucky girl.  For all these people that I love, I know they love me back.  It's such a great feeling knowing you are loved, cared for, and matter.

From there my brain took a turn (I promise I was listening to the sermon at least a little) and I started realizing that often I take better care of the people I love than I do myself.  I even admitted to Tom the other night that I'm constantly thinking about how to be a good wife, and trying to come up with things that I think will make him happy.  You know what his response was???  "Molly, that's crazy.  All I want is for you to be happy.  If you are happy I am happy."  Seriously what a great husband.

So, I've decided I am going to start loving myself a little bit more.  I am going to start taking better care of myself and allow the people in my life to take care of themselves (I still love you).  I think if I love myself more in the end I'll be able to love the people in my life even more.

To kick off this new focus I've decided to give up laziness for Lent.  Yep, the Queen of Lazy Town is passing the crown on.  I think giving up laziness will actually turn out to be more than a one dimensional item.  It's not just "I won't take a nap after work", but turns into "I won't take a nap after work, instead I'll go to the gym."  See??? multi-dimensional.  Giving up laziness in turn will help me on my success journey.  If instead of taking a nap I go to the gym (which I have everyday this week btw) then I won't feel like eating crap which in turn will make me feel better about myself.  See how all this works?!?

When I explained this to my mom yesterday she said she was going to try and give up wine for Lent.  I said Jesus had wine, so she decided maybe she would give up laziness too :)

This whole process is obviously going to turn out to be a great love story and I'm sure Nicholas Sparks will want the rights to it sooner or later.  You can look for "Loving Myself" (hopefully Hollywood will come up with a better title than what I just did) in theaters Summer of 2020.

XO XO,
Loving Molly

A Second Lesson in Blowing

Over the weekend it snowed...again.  This time it was that wet, heavy snow that's perfect for making stuff.  I was feeling claustrophobic from being in the house and decided I would be a child again and go play in the snow with the dogs.  I threw snowballs at them like they were tennis balls, which was actually kind of mean because once the snow balls landed the dogs couldn't find them and kept dunking their heads in the snow thinking I was actually throwing something good.  Rocky was the winner though, finding one snow ball and eating it.

Then I tried to make a snowman, but quickly realized I didn't remember how to make one.  I ended up just getting a big lump of snow that Addie walked on and Rocky peed on.  I gave up.  I tried to take a picture of it for blog purposes, but this is what I got.

See the lump of snow?  Yeah, me either.

Then Tom decided it was time for my second lesson in snow blowing.  You'll remember from a previous post how I thought the first lesson went well, but Tom had serious concerns about my skills???  Well this time I would say it went much better (this statement was later confirmed by Tom himself).

To begin I actually remembered the combination to get into the shed where the snow blower lives (trust me that was a big deal.  Tom has given me that damn combination a million times but I never remember it.  Secretly I wrote it down and looked at it before we went out, but he doesn't have to know that.).

After carefully surveying the shed from outside to ensure there were no spiders, mice, or other animals that might attack me I entered the shed.  I actually remembered what the throttle and choke were and I was able to get the beast started all on my own.

The problem I have with blowing snow is figuring out the best route to blow to prevent the blown snow to land where I've already blown (that's a lot of blows in one sentence!).  Tom saw my confusion / frustration and helped by drawing a map for me.

No joke...this is what he gave me.  My poor sacred Coco La Palm Jamaican Resort never saw it coming (no pun intended).

After having a good laugh at the map, I realized it actually did help.  Up the center and around.  I succeeded in getting the entire driveway blown and Tom succeeded in drinking a beer and laughing at me.  After our driveway was finished Tom wanted to be able to play with his toy a bit and went to the neighbors and blew their driveway for them.  Remember the neighbor Joe who ALWAYS helps us out?  Yeah, instead of having to bake for him this snowstorm we actually got to help.  Tom blew the driveway and I shoveled the sidewalk.

After all the snow playing/blowing we I decided to warm up and watch the Grammy's.  Tom played his flight simulator and yelled from the background who he thought would win each award.

 The dogs clearly could have cared less that Kelly Clarkson was singing her heart out and winning a Grammy.

Overall, I'd say this snowstorm was a success.  Except for the fact that there were no eggs in the house, which Tom decided was the WORST THING EVER!  I will never understand this man.

XO XO,

Eggless Molly

The Gym

I have a love / hate relationship with the Gym.  I think it stems from the fact that I used to work at a gym. Also I hate exercising.  BUT I even more hate being overweight and love the feeling I get after a good workout.  So it's like a catch 22.

The problem with working at a gym is when you go to another gym you see all the problems.  You know when you are getting bad customer service, you know when you are getting the run around, you understand why a class is cancelled and can't argue about it, you see people on cell phones and can't say anything, you see staff wearing items that aren't a part of their uniform and can't say anything, and you notice all the annoying things members do and can't say anything because you are just a regular ole member and no one cares if you used to be a manager at a gym half way across the country.

On top of all of that, people at the gym are annoying.  It always amazes me when you see people driving around the parking lot over and over again trying to get a close spot.  Seriously!?!  YOU ARE AT THE GYM park far away and walk (I understand this is not applicable to the elderly and people with small children).  The women (and sometimes men for that matter) that have coordinating outfits, a full face of makeup and hair done?  ARE YOU KIDDING?!?!  You are there to sweat not look cute.  I always wonder what kind of workout they get when they come and go looking the exact same.

When I go to the gym my attire is usually hipster homeless.  It generally consists of yoga pants and one of Tom's shirts and often a hat.  Even when I was young, cute, fit, and in college it consisted of my brothers sweat pants and shirts.

Now obviously I haven't been frequenting the gym as often as I should be and I am not one to judge those people who look cute and go everyday (except I sorta just did).  Hell I would love to look like half those girls in their coordinating Nike outfits who don't get a workout in just trying to pull on a freakin pair of tights (seriously people why are tights so hard to put on?!?)  and can look good in just about anything.  I envy them, I used to be them, and I am working hard at being them again.

I have been going to the gym almost everyday, and tracking what I eat.  I use bodymedia which I really like, and actually works.  I see results and that helps keep me focused.  I just get sidetracked / frustrated very easily.  I can very quickly talk myself out of going to the gym for any number of stupid reasons which doesn't pair well with the fact that I can very easily convince myself that I deserve that piece of candy.  Yep, that one that's sitting right there just calling my name...yep that's the one.

Yesterday, unfortunately, I told myself I deserved many pieces of candy and also told myself that I didn't need to go to the gym because I'd eaten candy all day so what was the point (see how stupid my brain can be?!?).  Now today I am paying for it.  I woke up with a terrible headache and felt disgustballs.  So today, I have no excuses.  I WILL GO TO THE GYM...I WILL NOT EAT CANDY.

Also, why is candy so mean???  It tastes so good, but after you eat it you're like why did I eat that now I'm going to be fat, but then you're like oh it tasted so good I better eat another, and so the cycle continues.  I think I am learning that I just can't have any.  I know if I have one piece I will have another and another and another until I become Bruce Bogtrotter from Matilda and have eaten the whole damn cake!

 

I'll keep you updated on my success (see how I said success???  I'm being positive.)

XO XO,
Positive Molly

I Do Not Have the Taste Buds of a College Student Anymore

Last night Tom had to work.  I was being lazy (surprise surprise) and didn't feel like making myself anything special for dinner.  I looked in the fridge and the pantry and didn't see anything that looked good.  I lowered my standards and looked again and found tucked waaay back in the back of the pantry a box of Tuna Helper.  The last time I remember buying Tuna Helper was in Virginia, so we've honestly probably had it since then.  I decided it was time to part ways with the Tuna Helper and whipped it up.

Now I remember in college thinking any kind of "Helper" meal was fancy and delish.  Last night however, I realized it is neither of those things.  The Tuna Helper literally looked like the crap I was blowing out my nose a few weeks ago.  The taste??? Bland and Blander.  I tried to doctor it up with some spices but then it just became a mess of garlic salt and chili pepper.  And no, I don't know why I thought chili pepper would help.  It was an act of desperation.

As I was gagging down my dinner I started thinking about other food items I used to love, but now think are gross.

•  Spaghetti-O's - Used to be a special day when we got Spaghetti-O's.  Now, they taste like ketchup with soggy noodles and dog food.
• Hershey's plain chocolate - Used to be the best chocolate.  Now, unless smashed between graham crackers and roasted marshmallows, smells like feet.
• Pizza Rolls - Used to be the best snack after school.  Now, as stated yesterday, taste like poison.
• Campbell's Chicken Noodle Soup (or any canned soup for that matter) - Used to warm my soul, now tastes like chemicals and salt.
• Powdered Parmesan Cheese (you know the kind in the green container) - Used to cover my pizza slices in it, now tastes like shredded up paper.

Not all food items from my childhood / college life are on the bad list.  Ramen, Oatmeal Cream Pies, and Fruit Snacks will always be my friend :)

Is this normal???  Does anyone else have foods they used to love and now can't stand?  Does this taste thing correlate to money?  Like because Tuna Helper was all I could afford I thought it was delicious, but now because I can buy food that is not on the 10 for $10 list it is gross?  HELP!!!


XO XO,
MUCUS (i mean tuna helper) EATER

Blurps & Burps

Last night while Tom and I were watching the Super Beyonce Bowl, Tom asked me to scratch his back.  This is anything but rare in our house, and normally there are no complaints and snoring commences quickly once the scratching / rubs begin.  Last night however was different.  I must have broken a nail at some point throughout the day and didn't realize it.  I went to scratch Tom's back and he yelped, "Holy Cow did you sharpen your nails?!!?"  Immediately I started laughing asking, "why on earth would one sharpen their nails, and how do you even think a nail would get sharpened?  With like a pencil sharpener?"  His response???  "No with one of those popsicle sticks with sandpaper on it."  I literally died.  He obviously meant a nail file.  Yes my friends, we sharpen our nails with popsicle sticks that have sandpaper glued to them in the Mullin household.

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Last weekend when I was headed to the grocery store I asked Tom what kinds of snacks he wanted for the Super Bowl.  Obviously he said dip first, and second pizza rolls.  He was lucky cuz both were on sale.  The catch was that the only pizza rolls on sale were the 90 count bag.  I figured if I got the big bag they would last a while.

Yep, all 90 pizza rolls were gone in 4 days (minus the 4 that he gave to the dogs and 1 that I ate and thought tasted like poison [Tom assures me that is what they are supposed to taste like which is not very reassuring]).

He texted me today and said his burps tasted like pizza...well no shit you literally just consumed 85 pizza rolls in 4 days.  What do you expect your burps to taste like?!?!?  I mean, I love you Tom :)

XO XO,

Wife of a Pizza Roll

Communication (Not Our Best Quality)

Tom and I admittedly have communication problems.  It's been this way since the dawn of time, or at least since the dawn of our relationship.  It's actually been a running joke with our friends, no matter where we live and no matter what group of friends.

People quickly realize they have to tell us both what is going on because Tom or I won't relay the message to the other person until the last minute or maybe even when we're already on our way.  For example, one time I was half way to Des Moines for the weekend to visit my parents when I realized I hadn't told Tom I was going to be gone.  Molly communication fail.

One time I showed up to dinner at a friend's house straight from the gym, only to find out it was an engagement party and everyone was dressed up.  Also I didn't know the people who had gotten engaged.  Tom communication fail.

Two weekends ago we RSVP'd to three different dinner parties.  We realized it the day before.  Luckily we both went to the first, I left early and went to the second and then met Tom again at the third.  Couple communication fail.

Luckily we are both I am pretty laid back and just go with the flow.  The problem comes when you show up to a wine party without a bottle of wine, or a potluck style party without anything to share.  I am good at blaming Tom and he is good at blaming me, and so the circle goes round.  Really we should probably work on this, and admittedly we try, but I think we are just doomed.  What one person deems important the other doesn't.

Eric and Kim (who really are becoming regular characters in this blog) gave us a hard time this past weekend.

Yep it really did take that much for us all to figure out we were going / meeting at church and going to brunch.  Our lives would probably be much easier if we just talked.  Until then...it's up to you all :)

XO XO,

I Talk A Lot Just Not When It Matters Molly

Random Tuesday

Randomness #1:

Last night I went to the grocery store.  There were a series of ads where you checkout.

Apparently Addie got a modeling gig I was unaware of :)  Seriously though, doesn't that look just like Addie who is in the right picture???  I told my Dad she was available for his next advertising campaign.  Ha!

Randomness #2:

I woke up this morning with three bruises on my leg.  I have no idea how I got them.

Randomness #3:

 Have you ever ridden in a limo with all the lights on???  It's like sitting in a hot tub without the jets on...awkward.  AND, why is it whenever the jets go off the naked people are always the first to jump out to turn them back on?  Seriously people, let the clothed people take care of it...we don't mind.

Randomness #4:

 We very rarely have ice cream in the house, but when we do I try to buy frozen yogurt or at least the low fat stuff.  I usually get cookie dough (obviously) or cookies & cream.  The other day I accidentally bought real cookie dough ice cream.  DID YOU KNOW THEY PUT WAAAAAY MORE BIG CHUNKS OF COOKIE DOUGH IN THE REAL STUFF?!?!?!?!?!?!?  I feel like I've been totally ripped off.  I thought I was just buying the low fat ice cream part not low fat mix-in's.  So, basically I am saying I want low fat vanilla ice cream with full fat, big chunks of cookie dough.  Does that diminish the purpose of low fat ice cream???

Randomness #5:

Tom tried to teach me how to use the snow blower.  I felt like it went really well.  He felt like it went really not well.  We still have some lessons ahead of us.

XO XO,

My Dog is a Model

Ah...Ah...Ah...CHOOOOOOO

Sorry for being MIA the last week.  An idiot I work with decided to come to work sick and has now proceeded to get EVERYONE sick.  And by everyone I mean everyone...literally the entire staff is sick and we just keep passing it around.  It's a petri dish full of germs up in here.  One girl has already used all her sick days for the year and it's only January (and she's still sick now for the second time).  I had to use two sick days, but don't worry Tom said it was just a cold and I needed to suck it up (he has the best bedside manner).

The nightstand with Lysol, sudafed, and kleenex.  The pups who are good snugglers and have a good bedside manner (clearly they got that from their mom).

I knew I was officially sick when nothing sounded good to eat (not even cookie dough).  I think I ate 2 pieces of toast in a three day period.  And you better believe the first thing I did once I was feeling better was to step on the scale to see how much weight I'd lost (4lbs).

I guess the only good thing about being sick was that I happened to be sick on the two coldest days in the last 1,466 days.  I think the high Monday was like -10 and the windshield was -40 (those numbers are probably wildly inaccurate double check with Belinda Jensen if you want accuracy) but I do know they were in the negatives.  When I finally graced everyone the dogs with my presence Monday morning afternoon night and let them out they looked at me like I was crazy.  Addie ran out the door obviously not expecting the cold got half way down the hill and then the cold hit her.  She looked back at me peed and ran back inside narrowly escaping Rocky who was smarter and practically peed right on the step.

Top Left = the door in the mudroom.  No we do not have fancy frosted glass, that is actual frost on the glass INSIDE!  Bottom Right = the door handle covered in frost.  The other two pictures you can't tell very well but there is frost there I promise, and these are INSIDE with storm windows / storm door!  That is how cold it is!

Finally by Tuesday late afternoon I was feeling better and decided January 22 was a good day to finally take down the Christmas tree.  Tom and I have been busy playing "guess the tune", "finger or twig", and "which dog is licking me?" lately and didn't make taking the tree down a priority.  Now I'm sure you're all wondering about the games we've been playing, and no they aren't inappropriate if that's what you're thinking.

These boxes may or may not still be sitting in the living room (they are).

Tom is crazy good at knowing a song after just the first chord.  Seriously, next time you're around him play a song...any song and he will know what it is.  AND if it was in a movie he will be able to tell you what movie and describe the scene for you.  It's mind blowing.  So "guess the tune" is a game that I inevitably always lose.  Basically we open iTunes or pandora put the songs on shuffle and see who can name the artist and title first.  Pretty much the only songs I ever win are Christmas Songs, Mozart, Beyonce, James Taylor and Chris Isaac.

Finger or twig (can be played with any other object not just a twig) is a game Tom invented in Jamaica a few years ago.  One person closes their eyes and the other touches them with either their finger or the twig.  Wow, the more I describe it the worse it sounds...I'm just gonna quit while I'm ahead.  But I will say this, we played it with my Mom on the beach and she thought it was fun too.  Yeah Molly, still sounding bad and now getting weird.

Ok well moving on, the final game "which dog is licking me" is self explanatory.  You have to guess without looking which dog is licking you.  Seriously, what is up with these games sounding so weird?!?  They don't seem weird in the moment...

Tom cheated...he knew it was Addie all along :)

Well this post has gone from sick to I don't even know, so I'm going to stop here.  Hopefully things will get back to normal soon.  Until then...

XO XO,
I've Shared Too Much Molly